so here's my new thing (inspired by the up and coming movie adapted from book of same name "eat pray love") - i plan to eat and to pray and to love. in that order. aka, i plan to start living again. loving my life, and loving me and loving God and after those two things have settled into my soul, i can love others again the way i long to. i want to feel the rush of life that used to run thru my veins. no more watching my life go by as i sit on the couch. so here, i know myself well enough to know that i'm probably not going to be totally consistent at this but i'm going to do my best to document my journey back to the land of the living on here. and maybe one day in the future, i can look back over this and see from whence i came....and never go back there again. to life, to life (l'chaim)